New "Get a Mac" ads

A couple of new Mac ads have been released by Apple today. One is funny and the other is kinda stupid.

Same two guys, but Justin Long's hair looks a bit unwashed in one.

As expected, it's a big dig at Vista.

Heh, heh.

Below.

What's in a Name?

[Editor's note: The following article is a hoax. While it may ring true and make sense, it did not occur. It is a figment of my imagination. Think of it in the same way you'd read an article from the online newspaper, The Onion.]

Ford Issues Recall on SUV Accessory: Name



DETROIT-

Ford Motor Company announced today that the auto manufacturer is renaming a popular option on its crossover SUV, the Edge. The Vista Roof, a panoramic see-through ceiling which extends the length of the roof like a full-size moon roof for greater periphery, is one of the Edge's signature details. However, sales of the Edge screeched to a halt and have totaled zero since first quarter sales projections became available. Ford has identified the introduction of the Microsoft powered Sync music system, a digital database of one's own music collection integrated into the vehicle and accessed through voice commands, as the probable cause for the failure of the vehicle.

"We were extremely baffled to see that sales of the Edge dropped to zero after offering the Sync option," said Ford spokesman Mike Moran. "We thought this voice-activated technology was a cutting-edge, no pun intended. We wished to offer our customers better ways to accessorize their vehicles and easier ways to access their music. The marriage of the two seemed like an innovative direction to take the Edge."

In researching why the Edge failed to sell a single vehicle since the introduction of the Sync system, Ford looked to its sister company to shed some light on the unexplained sales decline. Mercury also offers the Sync powered by Microsoft in several models, but sales have not been negatively affected. When revisiting the Edge itself, Ford officials had an epiphany.

The Vista Roof. Sync powered by Microsoft. The correlation became undeniable.

But before making mass overhauls and removing the Sync system from the Edge, Ford surveyed prospective customers who had been close to purchasing the crossover but declined after a test-drive. "The problem should have been so obvious from the outset, but we were blinded by PC propaganda," said Moran.

According to these polls, 100% of respondents declined to purchase the Edge because of the correlation between Microsoft's Sync and the ill-monikered Vista Roof.

"Vista blows," stated one respondent, who scorned the Edge and opted for a Volkswagen Rabbit instead. "I just can't trust anything Vista is involved with. It completely ruined my laptop!"

Most others surveyed had a similar opinion. "If the roof is powered by Vista, the in-dash iPod thingy probably won't work right," stated another non-buyer. "Putting Microsoft Vista in a vehicle just seems like a recipe for disaster. What if I crash? That Vista Roof will probably be the cause."

Ford tried explaining to prospective customers that Microsoft's Vista Operating System does not run the Sync system, nor does it have any function whatsoever in the SUV or its own internal computer.

"It is simply an unfortunate coincidence the roof has a name similar to the OS," said Moran. "Perhaps it was an oversight during development, but I assure you, the Vista Roof is not powered by Microsoft Vista. I cannot stress that enough." Sales however, remained static.

"The fact of the matter is, Microsoft plus Vista equals an overwhelming negative connotation," said Moran. "We didn't want to further stress our research and advertising budget in trying to convince the public otherwise, so we decided to re-focus our efforts and simply change the name of the roof rather than removing the Microsoft Sync system.

"We decided to re-christen it The Macro Roof. It is large and allows for a fantastic overhead view which magnifies the sky. And quite frankly, it doesn't hurt to try to incorporate the word 'Mac' anywhere we can."

Sales totals were not immediately available following the change.

When asked if Ford had any plans to change from the Microsoft Sync system to something Apple-based if the Macro Roof name fails to lure buyers, Moran dismissed the possibility.

"We had originally approached Apple to design an in-dash music system concept for the Edge, but we were informed they have exclusive deals with General Motors and Toyota. 'Try Microsoft,' they told us. 'They're more Ford's speed.'"

"Get a Mac" ad on the WSJ

Clever Apple video ad appears on the website of the Wall Street Journal wherein PC wishes to change an obvious mistake that claims Leopard is faster than Vista.

Ya gotta hand it to those Apple marketing guys who consistently come up with humorous and compelling truths about the Mac vs. PC.

Watch the snippet below.

"Get a Mac" ad shown only at Macworld

This ad was the opener at the Macworld conference yesterday. As far as I know it hasn't been (and maybe won't be) shown on TV.

It's a very big dig on M$ and the crap they put out in 2007.

Yep. Vista.

Watch the ad below.

Vista compared to hospital leeches

Cracked.com has a pretty interesting article about "Seven things we should pretend never happened."

The one paragraph that nailed it for me big time was their take on Windows Vista. Here's pretty much what they have:






No producer of goods in the history of man has sold so much while caring so little. The combined love and craftsmanship in the every copy of Windows Vista sold in 2007 would roughly equal that put into one toddler's Play-Doh snake. Here was a program with several features, such as a warning box that pops up every five minutes or so to ask you if you're sure you want to do what you're doing, so shamelessly broken that they seemed to have been added on a drunken dare.

Nearly everyone hated Vista, in the way that nearly everyone hates being stabbed. It didn't matter. About 100 million copies of Windows Vista were sold in 2007, because 90 percent of the PCs for sale were already infected with it. Want a new computer? Want to be able to buy software for it? Well, then you don't have a choice.

Vista is one of those things the future will laugh at us for, in the same way we laugh about old hospitals using leeches.

How twoo, how twoo. It's a sad state of affairs when you hear about Windows users who are "upgrading" their Vista machines to XP.

Pfft!

The entire Cracked.com article is here.

Also, and in addition, read how Windows screwed up New York's New Year's fireworks display here.

Vista - "Yer on yer own, dude."

It looks like Vista has had it. Fed up. Mad and pouting. Is sulking in its room.

"Leave me alone!"

This error message is a new one on me. There's nothing remotely resembling this absurdity on a Mac.

Gizmodo has a funny little snippet about this error message right here.

Fastest Vista machine is a Mac

New Get a Mac ad has been released and it features Windows Vista running on a Mac. The ad boys grabbed this fact and ran with it.

Vista... say Uncle!

With their lastest "Get a Mac" campaign, Apple's been hammering Microsoft's Vista OS big time.

Here's something different. They placed a video on the CNet site embedded as an ad.

Give it up for Vista.

"Mother may I?" - Vista

Taking security into the twilight zone, Vista helps protect all from everything.

Click=larger.

(MyMac.cc)

New Mac vs. PC ads

Apple has released three new Mac ads and this time they get three good digs in on Vista.


The Podium



The Boxer



The PR Lady



(MacDailyNews)

The fastest Vista laptop to date

PCWorld Magazine did some testing and got some remarkable results. After lining up a few computers from various manufacturers, the loaded up (or had loaded) the Vista OS, and ran the same benchmark test program on all of them.

Astonishingly, they found that the fastest Vista laptop was, in fact, a MacBookPro.

Check out a little blurb here.

(FakeSteve)

Cranky Geeks

John C. Dvorak is a tech writer for numerous computer related publications as well as having his own site, Dvorak.org/blog which he shamelessly pitches at every chance he can get. He is also a tech curmudgeon and is a well known Windows fanatic and Apple basher.

Well, the times seem to have changed. On this week's Cranky Geeks vidcast #87, two interesting topics were discussed. One was Vista and the other was Leopard.

I've saved the good parts and here they are. This first part talks about Vista and it's effect on business.







The second movie is a little shorter but the panel discusses the recent release of Apple's OS X Leopard.




(It seems that Google couldn't sync the audio with the video on these clips, so at least listen to the commentary. Sorry. -FCG)

Leopard: What will happen next

Here's what's going to happen this weekend: the Apple fanboys, true to form, will be going snake-shit over the new OS. The weekend promises to have plenty of pictures of nerds standing in line at the Apple Store, purchasing the software, triumphant smiles, and Apple employees standing in the background applauding.

Next come the unboxing pictures. The Apple faithful are the only ones who do this. They photograph the opening of the box and all its contents. I wonder if any of these guys bring the camera into the delivery room for the birth of their firstborn with the same zeal they exhibit for an unboxing. It's the same thing, right? Just different contents. Non-Apple contents.

Then come the videos of the installation of the software. There will be numerous screencasts and YouTube videos popping up all over.

Personal reviews will start stacking up like jets on the tarmac at O'Hare field in Chicago. The Windows faithful will not be far behind. They'll be poo-pooing the Leopard piece of crap from now until their bloody Service Pack 1 comes out. Deep down, these guys are eating their hearts out wondering "What the hell did I get myself into with this Windows Vista travesty?"

Then the Stewarts will come out. "Look what I can do!" Little tweaks will be revealed, Easter eggs will be found and then the incompatibilities will arise. The Windows guys will jump on this like hyenas after a lion kill.

Third party apps will hit us like a slapstick pie, and we'll be borrowing money from Uncle George to buy a lot of them. Wives and girlfriends will start to question their mates' sanities and fidelities.

Before ya know it, Apple will release its first Leopard software update, 10.5.1. Then we'll start over again, only no unboxing.

It's a never-ending cycle. It's one of those things that cults are made of and these are the cultist rituals. As long as there is Apple, and its uncanny innovation, there will be The Cult of Mac. I usually sit back and watch and wait for all the dust to die down. Then I compose a nice letter to Uncle George.

What the hell...

This is a scan of page 15 of the Tiger Direct catalog I received recently. Now, can someone tell me what Windows Vista Premium has to do with a monitor? The whole concept presented here is ludicrous and may border on false and misleading advertising.

"Oh, so your desktop computer with Vista doesn't display graphics correctly? Well, here's what you need... a Vista monitor." Pfft!

By the way, the Tiger Direct web site has the same model monitor with a different description AND a different price.

This is crazy.

Great Vista ad

Shown below is a very cool Windows Vista ad from BlimpTV that tells it like it is. It's downright funny and downright true.

You've gotta watch it.


(Via FakeSteve)

More irony

Stunning.

Entertaining.

Dependable.

Broken.

Truth in advertising

This ad has been floating around for a few days, so I thought I'd share it wit yuz. It's an obvious Photoshop job but it certainly gets the message across.

How Windows Vista was made

Vista. Out of the box

Still thinking of getting Vista? Well then, read what Joel has to say on his blog about it.

Here's a little snippet:

"I've been using Vista on my home laptop since it shipped, and can say with some conviction that nobody should be using it as their primary operating system -- it simply has no redeeming merits to overcome the compatibility headaches it causes."

Even opening the box it came in is quite frustrating.

Read Joel's short article here.

Vista kicked out of Olympics

The 2008 Olympics, which will be held in China, is off-limits to Windows Vista. The head guy of Lenovo (the ThinkPad manufacturer) cites the OS as "too unstable" for such an important event.

Sorry, Bill.

Read about it here.